Zombie | #AtoZChallenge

You are recounting more tales of your philandering. I stop listening after story number three. You are oblivious to the fact that I am hurting. That I still think of you and me as us, in spite of what I did, and in spite of all the evidence to the contrary you’re serving, story by story. Are you being deliberately hurtful, or just painfully insensitive?

*

It was our first official date. We were still tiptoeing around each other, like it was a dance, anticipating the other’s move, responding accordingly. At one point, you turned away. I leaned back, slightly tipsy, and I touched your elbow. And just like I knew you would, you kissed me. That was our first kiss.

*

After our first fight, we couldn’t stay angry at each other.  We kept apologizing, the argument then turning to how it was not the other person’s fault. Then we laughed with relief and fell silent. Until, we were both conscious of how heavy it was. It doesn’t matter if it was you who leaned in first or I. But I think of that too as a first kiss – a second first kiss.

*

It is different now. I’ve stopped listening, but I’m searching. Searching for a sign of that love in your eyes. I find a graveyard there – dead love, dead dreams. The words were yours; the crown of glory you were placing on your head with these shallow tales was yours. But the life, the joy you pretended to have was not.

We decide to take a walk. Through the old lanes, where each corner held something of us, the place I refused to return to after what happened. You point out familiar landmarks, as the fallen leaves get crushed under my shoes. We reach the spot where you park your car and I look in; there’s a flask on the dashboard. You’ve changed the brand of car freshener you use. I don’t know what your car smells like now. The passenger seat will always be filled by someone who isn’t me.

You ask if I have to leave in a tone that suggests you want me to stay.

I look up, taken aback, gauging the amount of sincerity in your question, and finding none. You misread my silence, and lean in before I can stop you. I realize even in that moment how forced it felt from your part, like you were fulfilling something. But I don’t realize it until you move away that I didn’t return your kiss. I don’t realize it until then that only half of me is present, the rest is numb.

Maybe we did this to each other. And maybe there won’t be any more first kisses for us. Because this feels like the last one.

 


 

Hi everyone! This is the last installment of the minimalist fiction project I’ve been working on all this month during the #AtoZChallenge. The story was shared in snippets, and the events occurred non-sequentially. I’m grateful to you for staying with me from A to Z. If you’ve missed any posts, you can find them all here

Z

Advertisements

24 thoughts on “Zombie | #AtoZChallenge

  1. Iain Kelly April 30, 2017 / 2:37 AM

    Congratulations on completing the challenge. I have been following your posts, an interesting idea. I enjoyed reading them 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Shubhangi Srikanth April 30, 2017 / 3:48 PM

    The pain and heartbreak, the emptiness, the end is so haunting, and your words make it come alive. When’s can we read the whole story in sequence?

    Thank you being a part of my A to Z! I enjoyed being a part of yours!
    Shubhangi @ The Little Princess

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran May 2, 2017 / 8:26 AM

      I think the story works better when read at random 😀 But if you feel like it, you can piece it together for fun 🙂

      Like

  3. Mayuri6 April 30, 2017 / 10:30 PM

    And you finish with a bang, Sreesha!
    Congratulations on completing the challenge, in style! Loved reading every post ! Thank you for teh brilliant writing!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Louise April 30, 2017 / 11:49 PM

    I’m going with “painfully insensitive” with a side of “self-involved.” And I believe I’ve dated him. He eventually grew up.

    Congrats on completing the challenge! And I really enjoyed reading.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran May 2, 2017 / 8:28 AM

      Oh, I’ve dated him too. That one stubbornly refuses to grow up.

      Thank you so much, Louise. And thank you for the shoutout in your previous post 🙂 Meant a lot to me!

      Like

  5. debscarey May 1, 2017 / 2:02 AM

    I can’t say I’ve exactly enjoyed reading this, as the emotions have been raw and ever present. But it has been a wonderful experience reading the story and seeing it unfold every day. Thank you.

    Bunny and the Bloke

    Liked by 1 person

  6. jazzfeathers May 1, 2017 / 2:48 PM

    Oh, I think this is one of your saddest stories. I’m nearly sorry it had to be the last one, ofter so many sweet and happy ones. But I really like it.
    That song is one of my favourite too 🙂

    Hey, congrats in completing the challenge! I think writing fiction during the AtoZ is twice a challange, so this is a double congratulation on my part.
    I really really enjoyed reading your stories.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran May 2, 2017 / 8:31 AM

      Thank you so much, Sarah! The series you did was so thoroughly researched and well written. On most days, I found myself rather tongue tied with nothing to add to them. I have to say, I enjoyed them tremendously and learned so much!

      Like

  7. Vidya Sury May 1, 2017 / 3:01 PM

    I like the Cranberries, and when I saw your post title, wondered if you’d choose this song. Beautiful writing, too realistic for comfort, Sreesha!

    A wonderful series this April! Thank you.

    Love and hugs!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran May 2, 2017 / 8:32 AM

      I love this song! Never tire of hearing it.

      Glad you liked it, V 🙂 Hugs and kisses. Muahh!

      Like

  8. Soumya (@soumyaprasad) May 1, 2017 / 6:44 PM

    I knew this would be the song for Z, I just knew it! 🙂

    Loved the way it ended, the last kiss.

    This has been one of the best series of A To Z I’ve read in terms of relationships and feelings. You are a queen of that, my love!

    Congrats on completing the challenge, yay, we did it! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran May 2, 2017 / 8:33 AM

      😀 I’ll tell you a little story about this song when we meet.

      Thank you so much, Z! Congrats to you too 🙂 🙂 🙂

      Like

  9. sanchwrites May 16, 2017 / 6:18 PM

    Wow! Great finale for the challenge. Can I just say the emotions really resonated with me. Going through some of my own shit right now and I am feeling a bit empty and numb too so this one totally spoke to me. Loved your series a lot! Hope you are turning it into an ebook as I’d love to read it again as a book in one sitting.

    Like

  10. Anmol Rawat May 19, 2017 / 11:56 AM

    Spectacular Sreesha! Just loved how you ended the series. The last three lines are poignant, but if someone reads them as standalone, they may also mean a new and bright future. Just saying!
    I get it now and I loved your series, seriously! That’s why I returned here today to read and know.

    Congratulations and if I have to pick my top 3 favorite challengers this year, you are there.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s