I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing | #AtoZChallenge

My jaw dropped when I saw you waiting for me at the exit. I blamed my overnight bus journey and sleep deprivation for what I was convinced was a hallucination. You asked if I wanted to grab a coffee, and hearing your voice convinced me you were real.

“No,” I replied, “I haven’t slept a wink all night. I could go for some tea, though.”

No shops had opened yet; only cigarette stands had their shutters up. If you were lucky, you’d find some that had thermoses of the beverages as well. We stopped at the first one. They were selling coffee, but no tea.

The same thing happened at a few more stands. I didn’t want you to tire yourself out, so I told you coffee was fine. “I’m not gonna catch much sleep anyway. I’ll take a nap in the middle of the day.”

You looked at me for a moment. What did you find there, I wonder. “No, I’ll get you that tea,” you said with a smile.

The sky was turning a soothing shade of peach by the time we found a stand that sold it. A stray dog walked up to you, making me jump mid-sip, scalding my tongue as a result.

“Relax. It won’t hurt you,” you said, and broke off a piece of your biscuit.

“I thought you’re a cat person,” I asked, wishing the dog would leave. It seemed friendly, but it was a stray.

“I am. Doesn’t mean I can’t pet this shweet leetle guy here. Yes, I can. Oh, yes I can,” you were baby-talking, I observed, both amused and amazed.

What was it about that sight that made me feel I didn’t ever want to be without you?

Don’t say it, I told myself. Words falter, words fail, words reduce.

“I love you,” I said disregarding the inner voice that was holding me back. I bit my tongue, embarrassed, worried, conscious, afraid of what you might say or think.

“I love you too,” you replied, looking up, smiling. As though this wasn’t the first time. As though we had been saying this to each other for ages, every night before falling asleep.

Perhaps we had. Not everything needs to be put in words.


Hi everyone! I’m working on a minimalist fiction project for this year’s #AtoZChallenge. The story will be shared in snippets, and the events occur non-sequentially. It is for the reader to interpret and form the “whole”. You can read all the posts here. Join me, and do share links to your AtoZ posts as well!

I

Advertisements

60 thoughts on “I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing | #AtoZChallenge

  1. Shailaja V April 11, 2017 / 8:01 AM

    You play around so well with that emotional uncertainty, woman. It’s magical. That last line, though. My favourite.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Geethica April 11, 2017 / 2:14 PM

    Not everything needs to be put into words. I believe in these words so much. I guess there are less words than emotions that we feel for our loved ones.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 12, 2017 / 8:01 AM

      Yes, that was exactly my idea behind this story – that not all emotions can be conveyed in words 🙂
      Thanks for reading, G!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Mithila Menezes April 11, 2017 / 3:36 PM

    So this is the first ‘I love you’, eh? Another pointer to the chronology of the series 😀

    The last line of your post also summarises the whole story. The way you presented the hunt for the tea-stall displayed love in such a blissfully perfect way! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 12, 2017 / 8:03 AM

      The first ‘I love you’ yes, but they’re already in a relationship. Are you making a Bingo board somewhere with the chronology? 😀 (I so hope you are btw)

      Yes, the last line was basically my idea behind the story’s minimalist style 🙂

      Like

  4. Lata Sunil April 11, 2017 / 3:56 PM

    Oh.. I loved the ‘I love you’s. You have captured that moment of expecting a response very well. Made me nostalgic 🙂 Loving this story.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Kaddu April 11, 2017 / 4:50 PM

    “I love you”s that just fall out on their own are the genuine ones. Rest… are just empty words. That last line was minimalist for sure. And that song… I love it!
    Happy AtoZing!
    Chicky @ http://www.mysteriouskaddu.com

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 12, 2017 / 8:04 AM

      That’s true. When it becomes perfunctory, that’s when you know something’s lost.

      Like

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 12, 2017 / 8:06 AM

      Haha, while I want everyone to figure out the sequence for fun, I also want everyone to read it in the random order. I’m so conflicted!

      Glad you’re liking it 🙂

      Like

  6. upasna1987 April 11, 2017 / 5:34 PM

    Lovely story with a beautiful end.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. shirleyjdietz April 11, 2017 / 6:02 PM

    I would agree, your inner dialogues (monologues) are so real and believeable. Also, the common beauty of your setting and plot have a kind of universal appeal.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Lalita April 11, 2017 / 9:19 PM

    Tea-stall hunting after bus rides is the stuff of best romances. I would retread every romantic comedy I have seen to include a version of this.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Dr Roshan R (@pythoroshan) April 11, 2017 / 10:08 PM

    I have some 20 published stories in various anthologies. And you make me feel completely inadequate as a writer.
    Excellent control over emotions and buildup.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Anmol Rawat April 11, 2017 / 11:35 PM

      And then she says it’s not her genre! :p It’s my genre, but even I don’t write like that!

      Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 12, 2017 / 8:08 AM

      Oh dear, Doc, you’re making me blush 🙂 🙂 🙂 Thank you!

      Like

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 12, 2017 / 8:08 AM

      @Anmol, Thank you! The two of us should maybe exchange genres 😛

      Like

  10. Menaka Bharathi April 11, 2017 / 10:14 PM

    A lovely story with a beautiful end especially the last line..being loved is one of the best feeling in the word 🙂

    Launching SIM Organics This April
    *Menaka Bharathi *
    *SimpleIndianMom*

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Ravish Mani April 11, 2017 / 10:29 PM

    It’s true that love doesn’t need words. In the words of Gulzar Sahab, “Pyar koi bol nahi. Pyar aawaz nahi. Ek khamoshi hai sunti hai kaha karti hai…”

    Well conceived, Sreesha, loved build up and climax of the story. The climax reminds me of that old Cadbury ad in which couples say ‘I Love You’ through chocolate sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Shilpa Garg April 11, 2017 / 11:09 PM

    I am loving this guy but am now wondering what really happened. You have hooked me to your story, Sreesha. Great going!!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 12, 2017 / 8:10 AM

      Just one more post, Shilpa… just one more 🙂 (shhhhhhh)

      Like

  13. reemamichelle April 11, 2017 / 11:15 PM

    Lovely story! And yes the last line makes so much sense! Love is not in saying but in the little actions that mostly go unnoticed or taken for granted.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 12, 2017 / 8:11 AM

      Yes. So many people don’t realize it’s the little things!

      Thanks for reading, Reema 🙂

      Like

  14. Anmol Rawat April 11, 2017 / 11:38 PM

    Not everything needs to be put in words. Indeed! That’s the beauty of a relationship. Things you can converse by merely looking into each other’s eyes can never be said in words.
    Another great addition Sreesha! Keep going and do publish it after compiling, I’ll buy to read it again 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 12, 2017 / 8:13 AM

      I feel so giddily happy when you all say publish it. But it will be really small. So don’t know. Let’s see how I feel once we reach Z 🙂

      Like

  15. Louise April 12, 2017 / 6:50 AM

    I adore that Aerosmith song! And your post – words falter, fail, reduce. Yes!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Modern Gypsy April 12, 2017 / 10:36 AM

    All kinds of awesome this series is. I’m sure I’ve said that enough of times already! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Vidya Sury April 12, 2017 / 10:36 AM

    So beautiful! I love it. I love how you wrote it, Sreesha. The words have to be said 🙂 I enjoyed how the words mushroomed in my head as I read them and assumed far more than I needed to. Hugs!

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Mayuri6 April 12, 2017 / 6:42 PM

    I just realised I hold my breath as i start reading your post and only exhale at the end. Yes, it is that kind of brilliant!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 13, 2017 / 8:21 AM

      It’s a good thing then that the posts are short 😛 Thank you so much, Mayuri ❤

      Like

  19. Soumya (@soumyaprasad) April 12, 2017 / 8:16 PM

    Awwwww, this was so damn beautiful! That last line made me fall in love with you all over again :*

    Write that book already, woman! Like NOW!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 13, 2017 / 8:22 AM

      Awww, thank you :*
      Books require a kind of focus that I just don’t have 😦 Maybe we should co-author one???

      Like

  20. swathishenoy April 23, 2017 / 6:53 AM

    Now I am very much curious about the order of the chapters. So much is happening but what happened when? Nice write up Sreesha 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sreesha Divakaran April 24, 2017 / 9:38 AM

      Hehe, thank you. I prefer that it’s read without order though. 🙂

      Like

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s