“We never grow up…

…we only learn how to behave in public.”
Today, I was sitting next to this wavy-haired girl in the bus. She was listening to some song on her BlackBerry-cum-music player (cum-calendar-cum-alarm clock-cum-watch etc., but they are not relevant to this story). It must have been a particularly good song, cos suddenly, sitting right there in the seat, her head went like – left, right, left, right, swirl! Normal people see something of the sort, and go “What the hell!” But me – insanity-stricken as I am – admire people with similar traits! I looked at her, and when she caught my gaze, I gave her an appreciative smile. At least what I thought was an appreciative smile. My smile always convinces people that I am mocking them, even though I don’t mean to. It’s a half smile, half sneer, half scowl, half indistinguishable lopsided facial expression. It’s unfortunate; I look rudely sarcastic without meaning to. So, our poor little girl with her multipurpose phone gave me a little stink eye and sat still as a rock in her seat. “Oh, come on! That was great.” is what I should’ve said. But instead I kept quiet.
Now why are we, as adults, so uptight? No, we don’t learn how to behave in public, we die inside, a little, preparing for the big day (you know, when you actually die…) We don’t find wonders in little things. I remember a time when I could not stand in a place, without dancing a little bit. It came so naturally to me, that I did not realize how crazy that actually looked to “normal” people. Similarly, there’s this guy in my office, who cannot walk without pretending he has a guitar in his hand (we fondly call him air-guitar :P). Then there are those who sneer upon those of us, who have these little idiosyncrasies…
Every adult realizes this, and is secretly jealous of the care-free, childish “adult”. They all have the thought “Why can’t I do that?” running through their minds. Uptight. That is all we are. Too afraid to try something fun, out of fear of making a fool of ourselves. But I consider myself to be somewhat of an expert in the making-a-fool-of-oneself field. Call me immodest, but I have done it successfully so many times, that I am actually proud of my abilities now! I am known to laugh at moments of absolute seriousness, I am known to proclaim boisterous facts about myself (this one time, I shouted “I am so awesome” in response to a friend’s query; a passing stranger gave me a most incredulous look that said “Are you insane” on such a high degree! But, I did give him a good laugh, so good deed of the day, I guess!) But I have been clobbered a lot for my expertise behavior.
Instead, I wish, all of us could let go a little bit. Just a little. Maybe go to a jungle gym and climb the monkey bars or go down the slide. Take the swing as high as it would go. Dance a little in the office elevator. Sing – outside the bathroom, maybe in the middle of the cafeteria. Play a goddamn unreal guitar in the air!
Cos laughing a little, and getting a little laughed at, is never injurious to health…

8 thoughts on ““We never grow up…

  1. arpitha September 13, 2013 / 12:03 PM

    Rightly said.
    Now a days nobody has time to notice what we do. But still many of us fear the unknown and never let go of ourselves.
    Nice post 🙂


  2. nothing profound September 13, 2013 / 5:13 PM

    I once started a discussion at blogcatalog, asking: “Why aren't there more people singing and dancing in the street?” The answers were quite instructive. People are so repressed, so afraid of being laughed at. What a dreadful way to go through life!


  3. Sreesha Divakaran September 13, 2013 / 5:42 PM

    It truly is a dreadful way to go through life! Even if someone laughs at you, that's probably the first and the last time you are gonna see them. For the moment, if dancing is what makes you happy, then dance. It looks crazy to a random spectator, but it's fun! And sort of liberating…


  4. Hiral Trivedi September 27, 2013 / 4:18 PM

    If these little things in life amuse you, consider yourself living the life to the fullest. Am glad people like you still exist. Everybody is a child deep down. Unfortunately, we are conditioned to kill that harmless quality. Enjoyed the read, Thank you 🙂


  5. Sreesha Divakaran September 27, 2013 / 5:36 PM

    Glad you enjoyed it. Your words meant a lot to me. Thank you! 🙂


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