It’s a funny world. If you do not have a Facebook account, then you do not exist. Interestingly, however popular it may be, Facebook is a word that has not been accepted into the dictionary. Which is paradoxical (in my head), in the sense, you do not exist if you do not have an account on something that linguistically does not really exist. Confusing? Yeah, I wouldn’t bother to read that sentence twice either…
I created my Facebook account sometime early in 2007. It became really interesting after a while and but later became more-or-less trash. But an addictive kinda trash. Some guy invented these crude funny faces (I used to think it’s Allie B who maintains Hyperbole and a Half, but I guess I was wrong… the images she used to create are funnier and more colorful. The FB memes are from a guy-head) and these crude faces would state the most obvious things about our lives, like “I wake up with messed up hair” or “I brush my teeth left and right” or you know, you get the gist. And it was funny. Vastly popular trash (have loved many of them myself).
Why am I straying from the subject? So, yeah, so what happened is, my sanity couldn’t handle Facebook anymore. I literally went mad. I would sit in the corner of a virtual wall and scream and scream and got the frustrating feeling that no one is listening. It was maddening. I was loud. And clear. And seriously IMMATURE. I said things that I shouldn’t have said. Directly, indirectly. But the fact remains that I embarrassed myself eventually. Which is saying a lot, cos nothing embarrasses me easily. In fact, it was not so much embarrassment as a realization that probably no one cares about me screaming (and here I go again, writing paragraphs. Oops!)
So, I went to my account, read every status line that I had put up, especially in the year 2010, cos that was the year I was really alive, like ALIVE. I read each and every comment that followed. And I felt happy. I was a better person then, though I say this myself. Echoing the words of a friend, back then, I walked and behaved as though the whole world belonged to me and I knew it. And it reflected in my status lines, cos that is the virtual reflection of our lives. Interestingly I knew things back then, which I do not know (or have forgotten) today. I was happier.
I couldn’t stand that I was not happy any more. Not sarcastic anymore. I began to hate myself as I am today. How I have changed. I hated that I was screaming like an insane person in an asylum, and no one was willing to soothe me, or remove the chains around me. I did that which seemed reasonable.
I committed virtual suicide.
PS: I can be reborn anytime 😉 Hopefully new/improved!
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